tips for online dating

I’ve only been doing this a little while, but I’ve already had a number of people ask me (in real life) about my experiences and if I have any advice to offer. I did a bit of research before I started (I research everything), and found that there is no shortage of advice out there. This article has some of the best advice I have seen anywhere, so I thought I would pass it along.

Some of my favorites:

Your ”About Me” essay is important, so take time to write something that ”shows” who you are. Gail Laguna, JDate’s spokeswoman, suggested that I get specific in my profile. My revised essay was much more detailed. I mentioned my favorite music, books and movies. And I’ve had an excellent response. I thought my new essay was too long, but I’ve noticed it’s given guys something to talk about. It’s made initial conversations less awkward.

My essay at first was very vague, but I changed it to show a lot my favorite activities, movies, books, etc. I’ve gotten a lot more messages from men I have things in common with since I have done this. For some reason they seem to be divorced guys in their 30’s, so I’m not sure what that says about me… but the fact remains that a number of intelligent funny guys have messaged me, and if I wasn’t picky about previous marriages it would be great.

Look at who’s viewed you. Someone may have looked at you and been interested but not taken the time to message. Or maybe they’re shy. A colleague at The Miami Herald met her boyfriend that way. She looked at who viewed her and then e-mailed him. They set up a time to talk and hit it off immediately. Now they’re talking about getting married.

I make it a point to look at who has viewed me and message them if I am interested. I know I have looked at profiles I liked and not messaged them for various silly reasons (maybe I was having a fit of shyness that day), so who’s to say they haven’t done the same? I’ve had a couple of guys respond to this, so it was worth the 2 seconds it took me to send an icebreaker.

Women, pick the men you’re interested in. Most of the guys you’re interested in don’t contact you. Slotnick says most of the good ones aren’t online long so it’s up to us to immediately contact people of interest. Internet dating is the most aggressive game around. If you want to meet the man of your dreams online, you have to get past the formalities.

This makes a lot of sense. The good ones are going to get snapped up fast, so if you see someone you like, do something about it!

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